So I’ve been a bit discouraged recently. I’ve been feeling behind at work (though I am starting to get caught up). I’ve also been discouraged with expenses. Since we got our new car our car insurance has doubled. I know this, but I forgot to take into account that we haven’t had the full six months needed to save for the payment. It was higher than I thought. We’ve been saving to get the truck into the shop as it desperately needed front end work. They called me today and it is going to cost double of what we had saved.
I found myself down over all of this and then realized how silly I am. God has taken care of us in the past, is taking care of us now, and will take care of us in the future. I got my Christmas bonus from work, and it will cover the car insurance with some left over. We have the funds to cover the repair job on the truck, and Ashley is going to have a bigger pay check next week.
Jesus repeatedly said to his disciples “Oh yea of little faith…” At least I’m in good company. I read this passage in John tonight and it was encouraging to know that Jesus prayed for me. It is so difficult for me to grasp that the God of the universe cares for and loves me. Not in some vague way, but for me as a person. It is one of those basic things that is repeated over and over again but that doesn’t seem to go from my head to my heart. Any ways here is the passage:
John 17:20-25 … My prayer is not for them alone. I pray also for those who will believe in me through their message, that all of them may be one, Father, just as you are in me and I am in you. May they also be in us so that the world may believe that you have sent me. I have given them the glory that you gave me, that they may be one as we are one – I in them and you in me – so that they may be brought to complete unity. Then the world will know that you sent me and have loved them even as you have loved me. Father, I want those you have given to me to be with me where I am, and to see my glory, the glory you have given me because you loved me before the creation of the world. Righteous Father, though the world does not know you, I know you, and they know that you have sent me. I have made you known to them, and will continue to make you known in order that the love you have for me may be in them and that I myself may be in them.
This has turned into a rather lengthy post, and as usual I re-read it and realize that it only partially conveys what I am trying to say. Oh well.